I can’t remember how old I was, but I remember a car ride into the mountains with my mom when I was a young girl. I think the initial reason for the drive was to look at the changing leaves. In reality, putting us both in the moving car was probably the only way we were going to have The Talk, since like most of our parents my mom was raised in a family that just didn’t talk about these things. I don’t really remember all of what was said, but it was fairly brief and included some information about what would soon be happening to me as I went through the process of becoming a woman. I do remember her encouraging me that it was normal and not something to fear. I also remember the elementary school health class, the giggles, confusion, and lack of reassuring information. I was definitely not looking forward to this process. And, from that point forward, there wasn’t a whole lot exciting or great about it. It was a hassle and proved to be painful, emotional, and the vehicle to valleys of hormonal confusion and angst.
Until…..as part of a home church, I had the opportunity to do a lengthy study on the male and female curse in Genesis 3. I learned so many things about my life, deep disappointments, and greater longings. One of the many things that I learned is that God created our female bodies with beauty and purpose and that includes our cycles! That we are redeemed from the curse, we are an irreplaceable part of the cycle of life, and that we can appreciate and be proud of the gift that God has given us.
Years later, as I studied natural family planning and fertility awareness in preparation for my marriage, I was in awe of all that I had never been taught in that “health class”, by any OBGyn, or any other woman for that matter. Angry really.
I wanted to share this information with women and began telling my girlfriends, taught classes to women, MOPS groups, and anyone who would listen. In one of those classes, some of the women started asking about sharing the information with their daughters. They wanted to be prepared for having the discussion later, as their girls got older. But, as we talked, I learned that many of these girls were already 8-10 years old. I challenged and encouraged them to start sharing this information with their girls as soon as possible. The more we share and make it open conversation, the less scary and foreign it is. And, if we don’t share it with our girls, someone else will. So, the next question was, “When are you going to offer a class for our daughters?” I loved the idea, but as a fairly new mom myself, I had no idea where to start in terms of writing curriculum for young girls and teenagers, and I still wanted to invite the moms themselves into the conversation with their daughters.
Fast forward to 2010. I have twin girls who are 4 1/2 going on 17, and an almost 2 year old daughter. With a mother that is a midwifery student, doula, and educator, my children (including my son) are not short on vocabulary regarding their bodies and birth. I am always searching for ways to share with them about this beautiful process and how amazing the body is, in language that is appropriate for their age. And, it saddens me deeply that there are so many adult women who have very little knowledge about their own bodies and cycles and therefore, have little to pass on to their daughters. Then, I happened upon a brochure for Blessing God’s Way ministries and a beautifully written curriculum for Maidens by His Design. And, I can’t wait to start teaching the mother/daughter classes! It’s a celebration of women and our cycles and is approached in a lighthearted informative way. What amazing creatures we are! And God made each one of us in his image! The course is designed for weekly study (5, 2-hour sessions) or a full Saturday and includes crafts, games, tons of information, and a beautiful time of bonding among mother/daughter pairs. Please contact me for information on scheduling a class in your community (hostesses receive a discounted rate) or click here for current class schedule and rates.
MAIDENS BY HIS DESIGN COURSE:
As parents prepare their older children for adolescence, one important component of this parental teaching is a mother’s instruction on her coming-of-age daughter about her cycle. Most parents simply give their children the biological “facts” about menstruation. But suppose you could introduce your daughter to this event in the context of God’s beautiful design? Home schooling mother, owner of Blessing God’s Way, and doula/birth assistant, Doran Richards, has designed a thoughtful and modest course that mothers and daughters can attend together in order to learn about this cycle for their bodies, about proper nourishment during their cycle, about learning to cultivate a joyful spirit of prayer and anticipation during their cycle.
What is particularly unique about this course is Mrs. Richard’s emphasis on the goodness and beauty of something that our culture thinks is merely a “pain in the neck” or an unfair burden on women: menstruation. She urges women to not giveinto these sad attitudes but to approach the onset of menstruation as an opportunity to get to know and understand your body and your health more deeply, and to give thanks to God for how you are made. Menstruation should not be seen as a curse or a burden, but as a season of life given to women by God our Father as a blessing.
“Maidenhood is a special time. It is an amazing process; so intricate that only God could have created such a process. I am in awe every time I think of it. You will be, as well, once you finish this course, if you are not already.”
When you’re going to have a baby, it’s like planning a fabulous vacation trip to Italy. You buy a bunch of guide books and make your wonderful plans. The Coliseum, the Sistine Chapel, Gondolas. You may learn some handy phrases in Italian. It’s all very exciting. After several months of eager anticipation, the day finally arrives. You pack your bags and off you go. Several hours later, the plane lands. The stewardess comes in and says, “Welcome to Holland!” “Holland?” you say. “What do you mean, Holland? I signed up for Italy. I’m supposed to be in Italy. All my life I’ve dreamed of going to Italy.” But there’s been a change in the flight plan. They’ve landed in Holland and there you must stay. The important thing is that they haven’t taken you to a horrible, disgusting, filthy place full of pestilence, famine, and disease. It’s just a different place. So, you must go out and buy new guidebooks. And you must learn a whole new language. And you will meet a whole new group of people you would never have met. It’s just a different place. It’s slower paced than Italy, less flashy than Italy. But after you’ve been there for a while and you catch your breath, you look around. You begin to notice that Holland has windmills. Holland has tulips.
And Holland even has Rembrandts. But everyone you know is busy coming and going from Italy, and they’re all bragging about what a wonderful time they had there. And for the rest of your life you will say, “Yes, that’s where I was supposed to go. That’s what I had planned.” And the pain of that experience will never, ever, ever, go away. The loss of that dream is a very significant loss. But if you spend your life mourning the fact that you didn’t get to Italy, you may never be free to enjoy the very special, the very lovely things about Holland.
However, the nine year-old is feeling much better today after complaining of a severe sore throat just yesterday.
Dr. Jeanne Ohm
